Our present mummies and daddies, when was the first time you heard of the word “SEX”? Perhaps, the particular year you got married or even in your husband’s house.
Let’s be realistic and true to ourselves. It’s high time we discussed this matter because it would save us a whole lot of life mistakes and mishaps.
In the 80’s, 70’s, 60’s and beyond, “SEX” was one prohibited word to mention in any home. It was a taboo to say it, let alone educate children on it, not considering whether the child is an adult. Fortunately, stubbornness and waywardness were not rampant then. Every child heeded their parents’ instructions, sought their favour and did not want to become the black sheep of the family. Other forbidden words were “Boyfriend”, “Girlfriend”, “Dating”, and “Relationship”. Trust me, all parents were proud teachers because everything went on well, no rudeness, no questioning, no argument and no disrespect, TOTAL SUBMISSION, DO AS I’VE SAID.
Unfortunately, there has been a total turnaround from the way things used to be. In the present 21st century, we have witnessed changes and they keep coming in different forms, dimensions and magnitudes. Our fast-evolving world of technology has made our adult children, teenagers, even toddlers very prone to immorality. They don’t need to visit cyber cafes as in the past. It’s right on their phones, tablets, laptops, television, magazines and so on. Cheap data which gives them enough and quite speedy internet connection to surf the internet, visit dangerous sites and be actively involved in almost ALL social media platforms (An individual has accounts on Facebook, Skype, Twitter, Instagram, Imo, Badoo, Whatsapp, LinkedIn, Nairaland, PInterest, JUST FOR FUN) with no genuine goal, skyrockets the level/rate of mediocrity. Immoral dressing and use of slangs gradually set in. Bad association/peer pressure flavours the taste, romance novels help them practice, while movies graduate them into the hood. The list can go on and on, there are so many subtle factors by which the younger generation is misled. The results are teenage pregnancy, rape and the likes.
The question remains: “What are you doing as a parent to curb the situation. Are you to share part of the blame? Did you do your homework well and in time?” For most parents, it’s NOTHING, YES, and NO as replies to the above questions. So, why complain if your children are misbehaving? The world is helping you train and mould them. Most parents are still basking in the euphoria that they can raise up their children using same old-fashioned faded methods which were effective in the past. No, no, no!!! It doesn’t work that way. We move with the change, else the children outsmart us.
As a parent, have you mentioned “SEX”, “Boyfriend”, “Girlfriend”, “Dating”, “Relationship” and such words to your teenagers? Yes, I said “teenagers” because at this pubertal stage of their life, they need practical and friendly advisers who relate well with them, not commanding parents. You can go as far as narrating how it was for you while growing up, mistakes you made, how you were wooed, people you dated and qualities you were on the lookout for. As much as these details are quite personal, they can go a long way in making you your children’s best friends and confidant. They feel free discussing any personal matter/experience/challenge with you, bearing in mind you will always accommodate them, advise them properly and help them avoid any pitfall.
Unfortunately, some parents do not get to educate their children on body developmental changes, reproductive system of the body, and other necessary information to be passed across to them. As a result, they are naïve, scared and doubt your ability to guard them as they get informed firsthand in school or by friends, most times wrongly… But, how would you impart what you’re not knowledgeable of? Parents and of course, parents-to-be are by this, charged to read and make useful research on these essential personal topics for sex education with their children at the right time. “Sex Education- when is the right time?”, you might ask. I would say, when in their teens. You know their capability and ability to absorb information. You are also aware of the fast-evolving world of technology we are living in.
Our children are our future, our light, our nation-builders and our world. We cannot afford to lose them or have them make grievous indelible life mistakes. So, map it out! Do it right at the right time!
The ball is in our courts…Dear Parents and Parents-to-be.